OUR 12 NEW HOUSEMATES!
It’s time for the analysis! I know some of you were tortured with my Facebook updates all night….. My apologies!
Natalie Cassidy
Well, when I saw Natalie’s kipper, I was like “Jesus wept”. I find she oozes desperation and after watching her reality TV show about her life, which no one was interested in I found myself just wanting to cause her harm. When she came out, she shouted louder than the crowd did, oh dear! But the intro music – Rizzle Kicks “Down With The Trumpets”. GENIUS!!!
The secret task was just genius! I have to say, my opinion of her throughout the night changed completely (yes I am so fickle!). I think how she did all of the requests were so cleverly done, respect! I’m hoping that I am pleasantly surprised by her during her time in the house.
Michael Manson
No idea who he was, but now I know, OBV it’s Free Willy (and that’s the family film by the way) and Reservoir Dogs and Kill Bill.
. He’s this year’s token grump and I’ve got nothing clever to say about him yet, soz about me.
Andrew Stone
Where oh where do I begin? “There’s a starrrrrrr maaaaaaan wating in the sky”. I don’t know if I may be sued if I say what I was gunna. But seriously, is he for real? Like for real? I am aghast at his delusion! Acting, singing and dancing in a very loose manner of speaking. He seems like an overly nice man, but I wonder if he’s really a diva who doesn’t warrant being a diva?
With all the speculation over his sexuality, viewers will be keen to read his body language towards the house eye candy, both male and female. It will be very difficult to mask under 24 hour watch! Let’s see if he’s to be as nauseating as he appears when the act slips!
By the way, bring back Pineapple Dance Studios
Kristina and Karissa
Oh dear, playboy, playmates! They really think that they’re something special but they are not! This said I have a feeling some of my mates will disagree. I could nearly see up one of their skirts, I had to get a bucket just in case obviously! Their surgically sculpted noses look like beaks. All the hair flicking and “looking over the shoulder poses” are getting on me tits like. Can’t wait to see them without the make up on, I bet they’re hounds!
Frankie Cocozza
I shall dedicate as much time to this as I did to my X Factor blog; Frankie you should go. T’ra………………….
Gareth Thomas
I have nothing but admiration for this man; he recently announced he was gay to the world, a brave thing in the very masculine sport that is rugby, having been captain of the Welsh National Team. He is a new and welcome part of the LGBT community and we salute him. He seems a quiet and humble man, not giving much away at this point but it’ll be interesting to see what he is really like. I loved how the playboy sweats seen him and thought “he’s rich and we’re beautiful ‘CHA CHING’”! Soz girls……………
Nicola McClean
Glamour modelling, married to footballer but I’m not a WAG. Not at all cliché is it? But you know, I really like this girl and thought although Big Brother prompted Natalie to approach her to say they “were good”, she appeared genuinely glad to bury the hatchet. I’m looking forward to seeing her because she seems quite a grounded girl. And only 7 pairs of knickers? Surely she can afford more than that?
Kirk
For a minute I was transported to Anfield and chants of “Who are yer? Who are yer?” I don’t watch TOWIE (I’ll just give yourself a minute to pick yourself up off the floor following that surprising disclosure). He’s an uninteresting wide boy and I noticed Andrew Stone paid him a lot of attention…….. But obviously he’s straight so was just admiring his jacket…………… REALLY…………………
Georgia
What’s with the friggin’ models! They’re gettin on me tits already! She’s a mix between the Kardashian waste of space and Nicola Sherz. She has got quite a set on her AND they’re real. Wow!
She seems a nice girl, but minus the make up and hair piece in the morning we’ll see.
Natasha Giggs
I think people are premature to boo and jeer her, I’d have loved to see the look on Giggs’ face when it stirs up all the press that he thought was chippy paper by now! To be honest my first impressions is that she’s ok and probably on proving a point of it takes two to tango! Ryan Giggs is getting off scot free and it’s the women who get vilified (and yes I am burning my bra as you read!).
I want her to dish the dirt, there’s no super injunction on her, DO IT NATASHA!!!!
Romeo
Where for art thou? There he is! I hate all this “I was born in a two bed council flat to a single mother from the gutter”. Stop banging that drum, YAWN! Having said that, I do like him, he seems quite a grounded lad with very little bravado and VERY nice teeth. He DEFINITELY flosses! I can see him leaving with Georgia on his arm, they seem a good match. He’s obviously got an album recorded that he needs someone to buy. It’s all gravy…………..baby!
Denise Welsh
Oh Denise, I’m sure that everyone knows everything about you, just pick up “The Daily Mirror” every six months. You’ll see her embarrassing both herself and her husband for a buck. She can be a bit cringey and I don’t know why she’s doing it or whether I could actually watch her. I really liked her on Waterloo Road and I’m hoping that I’ll be pleasantly surprised, but I’m not convinced at the moment!
Well that’s it folks, we have a good mix in this year’s CBB and I think I may watch this year! So apologies to my friends for the Facebook Newsfeed being choca with my attempts at Z list celebrity wit!
Peace…………………
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About the Author
"Michael is 29, born and bred in our fair city of Liverpool. He has a background in performing himself as both a singer and actor; he's passionate about both! Using this experience he writes for SEEN MAGAZINE about all things celebrity! Be warned he is brutally honest!"
"He is also a social worker by trade and uses this experience to write about some hard hitting and emotive issues when the mood takes him"